just life.

i’ve recently had an epiphany about life. buckle up. it’s about to get deep.

i’ve seen times in my life where i have thought ok when this happens everything will calm down, i’ll be able to focus on my goals more, prioritize, etc etc. it’s very easy to do and i think everyone does it. i know i have definitely thought that in the last few months. as soon as i get a job, as soon as i get out of provo, as soon as i’m away from this person. but the truth is, i’m still the same person in dallas that i was in provo. yes, some lifestyle changes have taken the place of others or gotten bigger or disappeared altogether, but i still have to make a conscious effort to not watch netflix for five hours every night and to eat well balanced meals and to shower on a normal human basis.
when i was thinking about this, a quote from one of my very favorite movies came to mind. it’s called lonesome dove and i guess it’s kind of appropriate because it takes place in texas [texas forever]. in this scene, a young girl named lorie [diane lane] is saying how much happier she’ll be once she gets to san fransisco. gus [robert duvall] then explains the following gem.

lorie darlin’, life in san francisco, you see, is still just life. if you want any one thing too badly, it’s likely to turn out to be a disappointment. the only healthy way to live life is to learn to like all the little everyday things, like a sip of good whiskey in the evening, a soft bed, a glass of buttermilk, or a feisty gentleman like myself.

now, i don’t really know if that applies at all, but it helps me to remember to enjoy the moments as i am in them. the only consistent thing in life is change so unless i enjoy where i am and who i am, i know i will look back one day and wish i had paid more attention.

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